Stupid jokes

Test for smart people...

1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?
The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.

2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?
Did you say, Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant, and close the refrigerator?
Wrong Answer.
Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your previous actions.

3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend.... except one. Which animal does not attend?

Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. This tests your memory.
Okay, even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly, you still have one more chance to show your true abilities.

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I'm serious!!!

Son: Mum, I've just swallowed a bone.
Mum: Are you choking? {#emotions_dlg.shock}
Son: No, I'm serious!!!


- Mama, am I stupid...?

- Yes you are... and by the way I am Papa! Cool


18 years old girl with 2 weeks menstrual delayed... the man to blame was called by the parent. An hour later, a red Ferrari stop outside their house follow by a well-dressed mid 40 man get out from the car.

- What an irresponsible behavior! The parent was shouting at the door step.
Then the man replied calm and steadily:
- First of all, I apologize for my ‘action’ to your daughter, and I will be responsible for this. If she gives birth to a baby boy, your daughter will get 1million dollars in account and if is a girl, she will get 1 million dollars in account too. But if there will be no baby...

Then father interrupted him and said:
- Then you will have to f@$k her again...

A wish...

Man spent 3 days in a desert and his water and food supplies already gone...
Suddenly he found a lamp and rub it, then Ginni appeared:
- Master, I will grant you any 3 wishes..
- Ok, my first wish is to have lots of water... Second, I want to live in a nice cold place. Third is to see lots of pretty asses...
- So be it... I'll make you a toilet bowl...