Religious jokes

Really Good Deed

This guy arrives at the Pearly Gates. He has to wait to be admitted, while St. Pete leafs through his Big Book.

He's checking to see if the guy is worthy of entry or not.  read more »

A Brief Guide To Religious Philosophies

Catholicism: If shit happens, I deserve it.

Protestantism: Shit won't happen if I work harder.

Judaism: Why does this shit always happen to me?

Buddhism: When shit happens, is it really shit?

Islam: If shit happens, take a hostage.

Hinduism: This shit happened before.

Hare Krishna: Shit happens Rama Lama Ding Dong.

Rastafarianism: Let'  read more »

Catholic Dictionary

AMENThe only part of a prayer that everyone knows.

BULLETINYour receipt for attending Mass.

CHOIRA group of people whose singing allows the rest of the congregation to lip-sync.

HYMNA song of praise usually sung in a key two octaves higher than that of the congregation's range.

RECESSIONAL HYMNThe last song at Mass often sung a little more quietly, since most of  read more »

Revelation 3:20

A new pastor moved into town and went out one Saturday to visit his parishioners.

All went well until he came to one house.  read more »