Computer jokes

New Viruses on the loose!

Oprah Winfrey virus:Your 200MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80MB and then slowly expands back to 200MB.

AT&T virus:Every three minutes it tells you what great service you are getting.

MCI virus:Every three minutes it reminds you that you're paying too much for the AT&T virus.

Politically Correct virus:Never calls itself a "virus", but instead refers to itself a  read more »

Ad Space

Microsoft (Nasdaq: MSFT) announced that it is selling advertising space in the error messages that appear in Windows.

Acknowledging for the first time that the average user of their operating system encounters error messages at least several times a day, Microsoft is trying to take financial advantage of the unavoidable opportunity to make an ad impression.

"We estimate that thro  read more »

Dot Com Mergers

In the aftermath of the AOL/Time-Warner merger, it has been leaked that Yahoo! is taking over the following companies:

DisneyData GeneralUnited Health Care.The names of the new mega company will be:

Hoo-Dis, Hoo-Dat, and Hoo-Cares.

Girl Friend 1.0

Subject: -What software version are you running?

I'm currently running the latest version of GirlFriend and I've been having some problems lately.

I've been running the same version of Drinking Buddies 1.0 forever as my primary application, and all the GirlFriend releases I've tried have always conflicted with it.

I hear that Drinking Buddies won't crash if GirlFriend is  read more »

Clean the Mouse

How to clean your mouse...

This memo is from an unnamed computer company. It went to all field engineers about a computer peripheral problem.

The author of this memo was quite serious.  read more »